One

It is 8:30pm and I am exhausted, though it has less to do with my first day of radiation and much more to do with two visits I received from Willa in the middle of the night last night. Thankfully my dad is here.  She has been told to visit him tonight instead. 

And though I wouldn't describe it as enjoyable, lying on the radiation table today was not nearly as bad as a hundred other things I've done in the past six months.  It's all about lying as still as possible while your left arm, raised above your head, falls asleep and grows numb and large machines with green laser lights whir around you and lob radiation at your breast with modern precision. But I have a much greater appreciation for the technology since reading last night's chapter in The Emperor of All Maladies.  As fate would have it, it was about the history of radiation and how it came to be used to treat cancer. But, as with anything, there was a period of time before people discovered how dangerous exposure was. As there was a period of time before doctors understood the importance of sterile surgical tools.  Thankfully our doctors no longer carry their scalpels around in their pockets or pick them up and continue working with them after they've dropped into a pool of blood on the floor.  Yes, there are many, many things to be thankful for.

I am enjoying this book immensely, mostly for the constant reminders that we are the beneficiaries of all of the medical experiments and discoveries that came before us.  And also for the history lesson.  And also for finally understanding where the Pap comes from in Pap smear.  It might be a little morbid of me to be reading it now, but I just finished The End of Your Life Book Club, so I'm on a morbid streak. 

24 more treatments. 

Hot flashes also bring cold flashes and why are they called flashes when they last so damn long. 

But my hair is coming back and today I wore mascara.