I am not thinking about tomorrow, or even about tonight. I am only thinking about this very minute that I am in because that is literally all I can do.
Thank you for giving me a reason to write. It is saving me.
Monday, May 20, 2013
The Chemo Diaries. Day 1 Part 2.
9:30pm. I am stoned. And very very tired. But I thought you should know that the timeline I was given, of feeling the effects in three days for three days, likely will not apply here. After Michael dropped me off after lunch, I hit the couch. I was able to get two calls off - one to Mom and one to Dad. I rested on and off. I drank liquids way more often than I wanted to. The girls came home and I helped make dinner. But by 7:30pm, I was lying on my side, fighting off a little nausea and getting very emotional. Michael walked in and hugged me but quickly fetched me some weed. I cried and cried and cried. I couldn't help it. I smoked while I cried and soon felt better. Stoned and better. And finally hungry. I ate a piece of toast and a bowl of the soup that my friend Kate made for me today. She is an angel and I don't know how to properly thank her.
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Please keep writing, Lauren.
ReplyDeleteLove you.
Love you!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your thoughts and your stories in this remarkable blog. I went through this ten years ago and felt like an alien. I kept trying to describe how I felt - physically and emotionally - and couldn't find the words. Your voice is a gift to the world. I hold you in my heart and in my thoughts, and send kindest wishes to you, to Michael and your girls.
ReplyDeleteI love you so much Lauren. Please know that even though I am far away I am sending as many positive, healthy, healing thoughts, prayers, and vibes to you and your girls and Michael and your whole family. Thank you for sharing and for writing.
ReplyDeleteI second Rellie...much love and prayers. xoxo
ReplyDelete