The Chemo Diaries. Good News.

You may not have heard the fireworks and cheering that went off in my house yesterday because they may have been mixed with the sounds of nausea and crying, but we had some good news yesterday.  Dr. Ruth took the second set of chemo drugs, 12 weeks of Taxol, off the table for me.  So my last round of chemo is July 1st.  The news was almost enough to counteract the poison/medicine that dripped through my veins while we met and discussed, though not quite.

Also, at 9:30am yesterday morning, Michael and I hit our old haunt, the NYU Cancer Center.  We had a meeting with a radiation onclogist, a doctor who will help us figure out a course of treatment for radiation.  In my case, as with the chemo, radiation is another preventative measure.  I do not need to undergo any raditation for any cancer cells that we know are there, because we don't in fact know that any cancer cells are still there.  But, as with the chemo, we take this course in the event that cancer cells might be there and we don't know about them.  There could be cancer cells in the skin of my breast or in the surrounding chest wall or in the lymph nodes by my collarbone or my sternum.  So both radiation and chemo reduce the chance of this cancer coming back.

Having said that, my chances of recurrence are already very low.  And there are side effects to radiation.  Because the cancer was in my left breast, which is above my heart, the radiation will come close to the heart.  Their methods of laying a woman on her stomach so that the breast falls forward helps to avoid the heart and lung mostly, but still there is a risk to radiation hitting the heart and lung.  There is also a small risk that the radiation creates a malignant tumor.  And there is the risk of lymphedema, lifelong swelling of my left arm.  So the ball is in our court as to whether or not I go through 3 weeks, every day, of radiation starting in September as a preventative measure.

Between the end of chemo and the start of radiation is when I would go under the knife again for surgery.  This time, for the breast reconstruction.  Tentatively scheduled for Friday, August 2nd.  It might go without saying that with everything else going on, the new boobs have been a blip on my radar screen.  But it is within the realm of possilbility that I will find some happiness there at some point.

As for today, I am lethargic, eating a lot, drinking a lot, and resting a lot.  Mom is here, Dad comes back next week.  I have thank you cards to send and health forms to send off for the kids and emails to respond to and the like, but today is a resting day.  

I love you guys!  I cannot thank you enough for all the love you send.  I feel it and swallow it every day and it is nourishment for my soul.  Thank you!